Why do regrets hurt?
Because we often choose the wrong ones.
We choose the wrong regrets because our society and education teach us what decisions to take, rather than how to make better decisions.
From childhood, we are drummed with decisions driven by comparison, popularity, or social norms.
Examples galore…
Dissuading a child from drawing on walls because it makes parents look indisciplined – rather than understanding how this drawing facilitates their growth. You can repaint walls, but you can’t easily reignite creativity.
Schooling merely for certificates and grades, instead of opting for learning that builds character and personality.
Debt financing homes, cars, and sadly even mobile phones simply because everyone else has them – rather than saving for personal freedom. Impulsive debts are premeditated future regrets.
Choosing a partner based on checkboxes and benefits, rather than deeply reflecting on what you’d willingly give up and why that sacrifice would be worthwhile.
We’re so focused on appearing decisive and getting things right that we often sacrifice the very things that actually make us decisive – taking time to gain clarity, learning decision-making skills, and staying open to change.
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🍪 Fortune Cookie:
“Making decisions is easy. Standing by them with clarity, and embracing the regrets you consciously choose – that’s where better decisions truly happen.”
To decide better, choose the “right regret” – a regret you’re willing to endure happily because it aligns with your values.
Here is how to choose the right regrets. The next time you’re deciding:
- Write down all future regrets you’re letting go of.
- Write down the regret you’d feel if your decision doesn’t work in your favor.
- Become aware of which regret feels right, then decide accordingly.
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Nikhil Kabadi 